Ever since starting Humira, I've had a new lease of life, and I've wanted to push my body and just see what it can do, now that it's 'normal'. But I forget, sometimes, that it's not normal, and I'll do something it doesn't like and suddenly every ache and pain I get starts me panicking that the medication is wearing off and I'm going to go back to crawling around in agony.
I've noticed pains in my knees for a couple of months now, and the consultant doesn't seem to think much of them. But recently, they've been getting really bad, so that today when I went on a one hour walk to clear my head, half an hour in, my knees were killing me. To be honest, I'm terrified. I can feel them aching and protesting, and I don't know what to do.
Of course, it could be worse. But it could always be worse. There's always someone worse off than you. But somehow, that isn't very comforting - nor is it very helpful. It doesn't stop making you scared, and it doesn't stop you feeling guilty for feeling pain. Trouble is, I'm not sure what could make things better. Probably sleep, I guess. And as my Granny used to say, we'll see how it is in the morning. Good night, Internet.
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